Trapped…
I feel like I have so much to say. I have so much on my mind. I am not sure what I want to say, not sure what thoughts are controlling my mind now. I just feel overloaded. I feel full of something that I cannot see or understand.
I feel like I want to let it all out. Rid my self of this fullness ,this weight I feel.
It is not a bad weight. I am not sure if it is good either. I just have so many thoughts and they are all so different. My mind wants to be running in a million different directions.. and because of my inability to let it run.. I feel trapped. Trapped by myself, within myself.
Ahh.. I have no clue what I am talking about.
Have you ever felt something that you understand so well, but you just cannot articulate? Something so personal, that you will never be able to convey it with the proper magnitude… something that just makes all words feel so weak. Something that only you understand inside your head. Something that when exposed feels so cheap… That is what I am feeling now.
Feeling things that only I make sense of in the safety of my mind.
The funny thing is that they are not feelings about anything in particular. It is more like a mood.. a complete feeling, but not about a topic. A feeling that is just there. I am not sure why this feeling came, or what triggered it.. but it is there and it consumes me. It controls my day. A feeling that tells me what I will do and whether I will be happy about doing it.
Maybe this is due to a feeling of being overwhelmed. A feeling that too much is happening in my life now. Too many people are involved. Too many feelings are being felt, and maybe not enough are being expressed.
As confusing as this is.. I feel a release. The release of letting things out. Putting them in front of me. In actual words that I can not run from. Feelings that are becoming something tangible. I have so much that I need to do. So much that I need to say to so many people.
5 Comments:
dunno how to comment... don't really know what to say..
but I enjoyed reading this post..
I always enjoy reading ur posts ;)
yalla ya 3am
Thank you.. That is sweet of you to say! ;o)
I know the feeling of not knowing what to write.. I felt the same way about your last few posts.
How is all with you?
it's all good ... am on spring break yayyyy :D
Nice..
so, any interesting plans?
are we gonna chat on your blog? haha
am goin 2 ain el sokhna :D
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