10 Best Ways to Freak a Guy Out
Today I had a very busy day at work.. it was full of .... Cosmo..
I found this wonderful article and decided to share it with you...
10 Best Ways to Freak a Guy Out
- Solemnly ask if your apartment makes you look fat, then burst into tears.
- Convince him to role play in the bedroom as Brad and Angelina… and start calling him Angelina.
- Say “We need to talk.”
- Throw out all his DVDs and replace them with copies of The Wedding Singer, The Wedding Planner, My Best Friend’s Wedding, Wedding Crashers, and My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
- Interpret his request to spice things up in the sack to mean shaving a biohazard symbol into your pubic hair.
- Casually say “Did I ever tell you that you really remind me of my dad?”… immediately after sex.
- After saying good-bye, run after him to ask, “Seriously, are you going to call me? ‘Cause if you’re not, just tell me now.”
- “Accidentally” bump into his parents (on their porch, in the faraway city where they live) before he’s introduced you.
- Replace all the numbers in his cell phone with your own digits, so that no matter whom he tries to call, he reaches you.
- Whenever he’s behind a closed door, locked or not, break it down with an ax.
posted by Nora @ 5:06 PM
24 Comments:
oh I'd love to call my Man Angelina in role play!!! LOL
Ironically.. I am with Fesh now and he was talking about how he would not mind being called Angelina!
Hmm, should I try to hook you guys up?
Yo! I think you just found me my soul mate....
Hook us up! NOW!
Sorry...
Fesh is embarrassed because I have outed him in public...
I think i might have ruined a potentially great role play relationship between you guys...
DAMN YOU WOMAN!!!
HOW DARE YOU!?
YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS... SO VERY DEARLY YOU WILL....
LOL
No. 9 is FUN, it's pathetic, but i should have done that to my x, that would have definitely messed him up for a while... hehe
ugh... I hate it when Nora gets in-between us Jade. Nothing would ever ruin what we have going on... but in all honesty what I said was: I wouldn't mind Munqy calling me Angelina.... But hey, that's me :D
Wasn't that last week's role-play? I thought we were going with the naughty nurse/horny patient thing this week? You promised we'd do that before I leave to Dubai tomorrow!! I can't believe you forgot.
Oh yeah and Jade:
*Munqy strikes a pose.
uh uh sista, you stay away from mah man.
errr... Munqy, I thought we agreed to turn the homoerotica down ... not go full fledged, like this?.. this is madness, MADNESS!
Madness? Madness?
THIS.
IS.
SPARTA!!!!
Also, they wanted us to tone down the homo-erotic stuff, and then they encourage us to grease ourselves up and sumo wrestle while they watch. With Jade prancing about in skimpy outfits. And midgets. Honestly, how can things NOT deteriorate?
*Fesh observing Munqy who is looked down in a white room with a small glass window in its door, looks towards the audience:
This patient here exhibits a sever case of closeted homosexuality that is illustrated by how his mind always leaps to the movie 300, a sausage fest featuring half nekked rippling men, whenever the word 'madness' is mentioned. Let me demonstrate.
*Fesh gets into his biohazard suit and enters the room, he approaches carefully:
Madness.
*Munqy struggles against the ball-gag in his mouth, but the only sounds that come out are:
Mmmfn? Mmmmfn?
MMF.
MMMNNN.
MMMMFFFFNNNNAAAAA!!!!!
Fesh,
If Munqy ain't calling you Angelina... I'll give you what you want babe... I'll call you anything you want... I'll make you strong... I'll make you ever powerful... Just give me a son & I'll make you king... I sweeeeaaaaar
*Jade looks over at Munqy's ball-gag & asks Fesh...
Darling... can I play with him?
Jade, before I agree to anything, how could I be sure you are the real deal? Do you have the freaky tail and all? That is a prerequisite for me to consider....
And yes you can play with it.
*Fesh hands Jade Munqy's leash.
*Munqy starts backing away from JAde, a look of absolute terror on his face.
Wait up, I still have the scars and broken pelvis from last time. We have a safeword this time right?
Right?
*Munqy looks on in fear as JAde continues to approach.
aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhh
*Jade takes the leash from Fesh...
"Yes Munqy... yes sweetheart - oh you are still hurting from last time?
Dont worry... yes this time there is a safeword... The safeword is 'HARDER'"
Hmmmmmmmmmmm, I smell a trap...
But seriously, what's the worst that could happen? Let me just call the ambulance in advance ... or should I just call the morgue straight away?
Jade, Fesh, and Munqy...
Thanks for helping me turn my blog into quasi-porn!
I do see very successful porn writing careers for you all!
:o)
man you teachers have a lot of free time!
got a job for me?
Superluli...
Teachers? Who said anything about teachers??? Fesh is a finance corporate whore, I'm a marketing corporate slut, & Munqy... well Munqy is got to entertain the crowds being his old Munqy self.
I can get you a job. Your name would work well a for a porn star... Call my agent.
xxx
Luli,
I never noticed it before... but your name does have "porn potential"!!!
:o)
Can you help me think of one.. I want to try and jump start my porn career!
Correction: Fesh is an IT corporate whore... after all those years and you still don't know me Jade. I am ashamed.
Fesh,
In Jade's defense I must say that it is hard to get to know a person when all interactions involve whips, masks, lubricating oil, and small household pets!
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